Reason in Rhyme

"What's wrong with rhymed poetry?" lament most Christian poets. "Our children like them; why not publishers?" As an editor often rendered comatose through the metronome beat of end rhyme quatrain, I wish to address a dichotomy effecting more than just the genre of religious verse.

There's nothing inherently wrong with rhyme other than shouting "unsophisticated" in today's literary world. Why is that? It has to do with the "poetic moment" hiding behind words chosen more for sound than metaphor. Effective poets are more concerned with sharing the intrinsic moment than searching through a rhyming dictionary and counting iambs. To illustrate the point, I offer two examples of the same poem. The first I created in the style of most Christian poetry. It's basically sound and might even seem to be a good expression of what it means to rely on God. However, since it relies upon limited words of "telling" rather than the kind of imagery that can transcend epochs of time and borders of nationality, would it endure through the ages?

My God guides and provides

so all my needs are met,

a kind of peace of mind

to know my feet are set

on the path to prosperity

rooted in eternity.

Although my faith may suffer

when evil lurks around

I am brave in the knowledge

God's mercies still abound.

Even when facing slander

from those who doubt His love

I am covered up with blessings

from the heavenly host above

What more could I desire

than my Master's healing touch

and the chance to live forever

with The One who gives so much.

Nice poem -- even inspiring? I would hope so -- after all, I did create it -- if only to make a point. However, it's but a flickering candle eclipsed by the bonfire of that which it's based on: The 23rd psalm:

The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside still waters,

he restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness

for his name's sake.

Even though I walk

through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil,

for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil;

my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and love will follow me

all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the LORD

forever.

THIS will continue to endure as my rhyme sinks into obscurity. David used allegory to turn limited words into eternal imagery: The LORD is my shepherd expresses His guidance whether resting in green pastures beside still waters or passing through the valley of the shadow of death. Metaphor and simile are powerful tools to convey far more than the simple words can express of and by themselves. And, notice: no rhyme. I don't know how they sounded in the original language used, but the imagery has continued on as the eternal soul of that which originally gave it life.

All this being said, don't utterly neglect rhyme; it can add essence to poetry as spice adds flavor to nourishment. Just be sure the poem is not DRIVEN by rhyme. Take care certain words are not chosen and/or convoluted in a struggle of rhyme over reason. Rhyme actually has its best impact when woven into the warp and woof of the poetic fabric and comes as a surprise in the accentuation of a particular point, whether religious or otherwise.

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