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Change of Life There is nothing more amusing to parents than to hear their children announce how they will change things with their children when they grow up. I know that I have been on both sides of that particular issue. It’s just that everything seems so simple when we are young and protected. One of my past friends talked about how his formerly smug son came to him a year into his marriage. "How do you do it?" Was his plea regarding bills and the demands of managing a family? How indeed? Our relationship with God is much the same. When our eyes are first opened to Him, we tend to think we have a complete picture of what Christianity entails. The fact that anyone anointed to responsibility within God’s family is not to be new to the faith should give us a bit of a clue; but it really doesn’t. Wherever we find ourselves along the road to enlightenment, we tend to think we have a clear view of what lies ahead. Then, when the unexpected fork appears in the road, the tenderfoot traveler is taken off guard. This very thing happened to me right when I was absolutely certain of my heading. As a member of an Evangelical Free Church, I still lacked what my intellect required. I had been challenged to show I was not just a dupe of blind faith. I felt God must have a way of reaching such as sought more in depth knowledge of Him. I prayed for an answer and he gave it to me in answers unavailable within my cliquish little congregation. One night, while at my school year job of delivering pizzas, I hit the [preset on my radio, but the wrong station stepped into my life. All I heard were the words of Garner Ted Armstrong proclaiming, "be sure to send in for your free copy of The Proof of the Bible and Ten Proofs God Exists." I reset the station and tuned in the next night; I was hooked. After a year of unsuccessfully trying to balance this new input with my present fellowship, I switched to the World Wide Church of God. This of itself was a tremendous change for me. I drove my friends and family nuts preaching to them The Plain Truth of "The World Tomorrow" and the evil of false Christian teachings. It didn’t matter that I became a pariah to them and destroyed my marriage in the process. What mattered was that I accurately get down all the details of Faith. Grace was a free gift of God, to be sure, but if you weren’t properly "in the Lord," how could you be sure of that election to Grace. Any who accused me of covering Grace with a cloak of fear, were, in turn, accused of watering down the Law of Yahweh. The Commandments, with that Seventh Day Sabbath, were the only substance upon which to hang ones cloak. For the next 25 years I let others do my thinking as I "proved" each doctrine along the path. Those issues that didn’t compute, I stuck away in little boxes up in a back shelf of my mental closet. Someday, I would be able to find those answers, but for the moment I was content to pay and pray. Then, suddenly, that day dawned with a clod hard light. Our church leadership confessed they had been teaching error. More damning, they admitted fear of potential consequences had led "my protectors" to continuing such apostasy even after the error was apparent to all in authority. Our most basic doctrines were being challenged. The Saturday Sabbath, a keystone of our fellowship, was changed to the person of Jesus Himself. The church split, then split again. I held on tight. I had proved so much; was so confident of all I had learned. How could what I had come to be so certain of turnout to be error? But, eventually the cold splash of reality washed me from my cloistered nest. Down I tumbled. It was learn to fly or perish. As I spread my wings, substance filled them, halting my tumble and lifting me to new heights. What was this substance? It was that which had carried me all along: The unfaltering love of Jesus. I had spent my entire life proving Him to myself. Whether I was seated in the midst of congregation or at the highest branches of a tree, studying scripture or the design of a feather, staring into the heavens or the eyes of a newborn. In whatever the fellowship I had found myself, it had always been to Jesus that I had set my focus. Once again, like Peter when he began to sink into the Sea of Galilee, I turned my eyes from the swirling storm of controversy to focus on my Savior. My old fellowship split into four distinct groups each asserting itself in possession of Truth. As one fellowship lifted hands in songs of praise to God, another wrapped its whole being around the Ten Commandments, a third shouted out prophecies, while another sought some middle ground. Mostly, though, each displayed a sign of tongues; the metaphorical sticking out of which signified a different spirit than the one I sought. I was now like the heir mentioned in Galatians 3:24. The Law had been my Pedagagos protecting me, as I was lead to a deeper understanding of what Jesus meant for me. Now, I was no longer just a child in Christ. The time had come for me to shed the Pedagagos and walk with the Lord into a New World of possibilities. The world of cyber space where hands reach out across continents, nations, races, and creeds. So, here I am. You are all my fellowship. My body sits at a keyboard as my spirit soars amongst you all sharing, as I never was free to share ensconced in a pew. It was tough letting go of ideas of which I had once been certain. However, this change in my life has taught me a valuable lesson. If I could have been so wrong about something of which I had been so certain, then how could I judge the cherished beliefs of others? The time had come for me to shed my cloister and learn to interact within the full Body of Faith. So, though I have found a new modem of connection, I do not limit myself to the keyboard. Where I used to shun those of varied substance, now I openly exchange views wherever possible valuing other perspectives as I attempt to pass forward what I have received. For me, I live with the words of Paul, "determined to know nothing amongst you saving Jesus and Him crucified." All the rest is details |
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